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Hot Dwarves: Peter Jackson strikes back… with Bombur!

July 13, 2011 at 9:05 pm by maegwen  - 

(The following opinion piece is third in the “Hot Dwarves” series, following yesterday’s Now this is what I’m talking about)

 

Hey ‘Hobbit’ PR machine!

9 out of 10 women agree: Bifur, Bofur & Bombur are hot.

Dwarf women!

But so do we! They definitely look hot in those outfits – hey, fur and leather and hair and all that gear is definitely hot. Sweaty hot! And oooooh, did I mention that hair? Steamy!

** grin **

In a strategic move of photo-releasage, Peter Jackson gave us three more dwarves today and has successfully quelled the squees of outrage over the glowering sexiness that is Kili. Bravo, sir!

Sexy to the great hormone-driven hordes of fangirls, at least. After all, dwarf women really aren’t into dwarves ‘Being Human’ – are they?

** sits back and basks in own cleverness **

There’s a lot to love about the company, if you think about it.

Today’s delivery brings Bofur’s cheeky grin – yes, it’s there, under the hair. And a dimple! Bifur? Those might be eagle wings sitting on top of his head – Any ornithologists out there?

Like the pointy look? Well, Nori is the dwarf for you, complete with an impressive staff. Prefer your dwarves studious? Maybe Ori is more your type, check out the book and cowl. Dori has whiskers growing out of his nostrils – dreamy! Oin and Gloin … hey there, bad boys. Rawr.

And then there’s Bombur. Rapunzel is SO stealing that braid idea. Or maybe I will.

** bigger grin **

A fellow staffer and serious curmudgeon quipped his own review of the recent picture:

“Panicked that hordes of Tolkien nerds were beginning to organise an active rebellion against his “inventive” re-imagination of The Hobbit, Peter Jackson today gave us a fat dwarf in an attempt to show that he actually pays attention to canon.”

 Ouch. Now, now. It will be alright. Just close your eyes, lie back and dream of Erebor. That’s a good boy.

** laugh **

Seriously though, I really can’t wait for more. Three to go, Peter! Bring it on!

I’ve got the ice buckets waiting!

I almost made it through this without using this word: Thorin.

Now I’m done.

 

=============================================

This is an opinion piece and does not represent views and opinions of TheOneRing.net as a whole.

maegwen is a long-time senior staffer and jokester who reigns in TORn’s chat room where she grumbles about Orli fangirls, Mumakil-surfing Legolas, and “Go home, Sam.” She is also vaguely mortified by her descent into Thorin-fangirlism.

 

 

Posted in Adam Brown, Aidan Turner, Casting Rumors, Graham McTavish, Headlines, Hobbit Cast News, Hobbit Movie, James Nesbitt, Mark Hadlow, Martin Freeman, Peter Hambleton, Richard Armitage, Stephen Hunter, The Hobbit, Uncategorized on July 13, 2011 by
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23 responses to “Hot Dwarves: Peter Jackson strikes back… with Bombur!”

  1. MyrL says:

    Love it Maegwen! Keep up the great work 🙂

    I can’t keep from saying it either ….Thorin!

  2. Aym Goss says:

    This ridiculous company has nothing to do with the real company of Thorin. People know nothing abouth the people of dwarves from the Middle-earth described by JRR Tolkien in The Hobbit, LOTR, and the different volumes of The History of the Middle-Earth. And when I say people I include your site. You seem to be more fond of Peter Jackson and his band than Tolkien himself. However, good luck to you for the future 

  3. Shirlz says:

    Love it! Can’t wait for the rest of the company to be revealed. Especially Richard Armitage as Thorin! 🙂 

  4. gottarhyme says:

    I adore Aidan Turner! He is going to be one HOT dwarf, I see!

  5. thinker says:

    I feel sorry for the eagle that is going to save Bombur and take him from the tree…my spine hurts when I think about it…

  6. Dont know why everyone is so obsessed with RA and Thorin, Im still not convinced RA is cut out for it! I cannae wait for Balin!!

  7. horsegirl says:

    Indeed. I await anxiously to see what the great Thorin Oakenshield looks like……..

  8. Tim says:

    “Hot dwarf” is an oxymoron.

  9. Garmling says:

    you can see Thorin in that picture from Empire where Bilbo is reading some script and in the background, there he is!

  10. Dr. Corndog says:

    Having to read the author’s own reactions to her perceived wit after every other paragraph made reading this article a very painful experience.

  11. S says:

    Honestly, I find it strange that so many people get all upset about Kili and yet I see so little fumfurraw over Nori’s unbelievably silly hairdo.  I consider that far more un-Tolkien than the idea that a young dwarf might actually be attractive to anyone but another dwarf.  That ‘do looks like something Lady Gaga might sport.

  12. Ryan Togioka says:

    For the record, I think the hair is some kid of Celtic-inspired motif. The Celts used to put up their hair into points like that before they went into battle.

    Ridiculous? Maybe to some. But Nori’s got a full (tri-pointed) beard to balance out the star-head. And honestly, I kind of like it. Its no less ridiculous than some of the whacked-out hair styles that have existed throughout history.

  13. Ryan Togioka says:

    For the record, I think the hair is some kid of Celtic-inspired motif. The Celts used to put up their hair into points like that before they went into battle.

    Ridiculous? Maybe to some. But Nori’s got a full (tri-pointed) beard to balance out the star-head. And honestly, I kind of like it. Its no less ridiculous than some of the whacked-out hair styles that have existed throughout history.

  14. Ryan Togioka says:

    Also, I agree with you on Kili. As long as he doesn’t start using that bow for Legolas-like trick shots, he’s cool by me.

  15. CG says:

    Isn’t that Thorin dead center in the picture?

    http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20504849,00.html#20980350

  16. CG says:

    Isn’t that Thorin dead center in the picture?

    http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20504849,00.html#20980350

  17. Youarehobbit says:

    When are they going to release the picture of snow white? Oh wait.. what?… this is “The Hobbit”? My bad.

  18. Youarehobbit says:

    When are they going to release the picture of snow white? Oh wait.. what?… this is “The Hobbit”? My bad.

  19. Bregalad says:

    I just hope they’re doing a good appearence for Balin.

  20. Bregalad says:

    I just hope they’re doing a good appearence for Balin.

  21. S says:

     If it is inspired by the Celts, then that makes it even more un-Tolkien, as the Professor did not much care for Celtic culture and did not base any of his characters in that milieu.  He was a fan of the Anglo-Saxons (the template for the Rohirrim, and he wouldn’t have liked the way PJ loaded them up with Celtic art and symbolism).

  22. Wrestlertk says:

    Is it just me, or does Bifur have an axe head stuck into his forehead? 

    look closely… :/

  23. Wrestlertk says:

    Is it just me, or does Bifur have an axe head stuck into his forehead? 

    look closely… :/

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