You just might be in for a frightful tale if you’re brave enough to join Fili and…
Continue Reading
You just might be in for a frightful tale if you’re brave enough to join Fili and Kili to learn how to make caramel apples… Happy Halloween! If you want another thrilling tale, check out Kili’s book here. WARNING: This caramel is dangerously sticky/chewy! The recipe is below if you’d like to try it out yourself! Continue reading “Happy Hobbit: Caramel Apples (Halloween Special)”
Yes, this story will be riddled with spoilers in it, and some snark.
With less than 2 months to go before The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, we at TheOneRing.net thought you might like a little survival guide if you happen to be Arachnophobic or Drakonophobic. The Lord the Rings: The Return of the King was a little hard on many avowed Arachophobe Tolkien fans, this reporter’s sister being one of them. She watched the entire Shelob sequence from behind her purse every time she saw it on the big screen. It was only when she saw it on DVD that she could watch it unfettered.
Long before Tolkien conceived of Sam fighting off Shelob to try and save Frodo, he placed an entire Colony of giant Spiders in Mirkwood to trap the Company of Dwarves for Bilbo to rescue. This was Bilbo’s first real challenge to help the Company and he rose to the occasion. Here you can see the fear on Bilbo’s face, but he conquers it to save the Dwarves, and you can conquer your Arachnophobia too. 
As for Drakonophobia, that may have been made up word, not quite sure, but better safe than sorry. Now, to be fair, there are probably more Arachnophobes than there are Drakonophobes in the world simply because there are more spiders in the world than there are dragons. We have all those Knights in Shining Armor to thank for that. Except in China, where the dragons settled in the Rivers and became good luck symbols and come out every Chinese New Year. Gung Hey Fat Choy!!!! 
Dragons as seen in Tolkien’s Middle-earth can easily instill Drakonophobia in man and beast alike , and Smaug is the most famous of those dragons. There was fear, mixed with anger and sadness when Thorin told the story of Smaug’s attack on the Lonely mountain, killing so many and driving out the few survivors. Thranduil would not risk his own people to help and Dale was completely destroyed. The entire area around the Lonely Mountain was called the Desolation of Smaug while the Men of Lake-town built their town on stilts over the lake in the hopes of surviving future dragon attacks. Smaug has not been seen in 60 years, and yet Drakonophobia is still affecting the people of Lake-town to this day. But no one is really sure he is still really alive since it’s been so long since he was last seen, at least not until Bilbo makes his fateful first burgal attempt. 
So, without further ado, here are a few helpful pointers on how to survive your inner phobias when spiders and dragons appear onscreen.
1) Read The Hobbit before the film opens, familiarity makes it easier to handle shocks of this nature, at least the chapters in Mirkwood through Bilbo entering the Lonely Mountain.
2) Go with a really tall friend and sit behind them. If you have no tall friend, find a tall person in the theater and sit behind them.
3) If you prefer to see the film unfettered, then bring a jacket or purse to put in front of your eyes during the spider or dragon scenes.
4) Failing a jacket or purse, buy a soda or popcorn to raise up, my preference would be popcorn, because if you spill it from fright, it is less messy and certainly not cold or sticky.
5) Bring Litzi (Red Envelope with money or gold in it) purely to use as a Chinese New Year gift/bribe
6) Put on your Ring of Power and hide
7) Hold hands with your best friend, try not to cut off the circulation.
8) Run out of the theater during the scary bits (works for children)
9) If running out of the theater seems to be a waste of money, just close your eyes, but you may need to hold your hands over years ears too, those spiders seem to make some creepy noises. Smaug, on the other hand has a rather awesome voice.
10) Wait for the film to come out on DVD/Blu-ray
Could the Disney theme parks be the next potential location for a Lord of the Rings-themed attraction? We reported back in January and also in February that tongues were wagging about a possible Middle-earth theme park partnership between Warner Brothers and Universal. There was even documentation that the Saul Zaentz Company had registered “several uses for Middle-earth properties that includes theme parks.” But those rumors seemed to have fizzled.
Now it seems that, “Disney and Warner Brothers have either signed or are very close to singing an agreement that will bring “The Lord of the Rings” and “The Hobbit” movie-inspired areas to the Disney Parks.” WDW News Today is reporting that the partnership has been in the works since late last year and is now practically a fait accompli. The story claims that Disney may incorporate a Middle-earth attraction as part of an overhaul at the California Adventure park in Anaheim, CA. It also suggests that Disney may be looking for Hobbits to give them an edge over Hogwarts in order to compete with the Wizarding World of Harry Potter area at Universal Studio’s theme park.
WDW News today says, “As with any rumor, you should take this with a grain of salt until it is actually announced.” Is it likely that Disney would be able to overcome the hurdles that have hung up similar ventures? That they could overcome the long-held anti-Disney prejudice from within the Tolkien Estate itself? TORn staffer Demosthenes points out Tolkien’s Letter #13, where he famously insisted that he would “veto anything from or influenced by the Disney Studios (for all whose works I have a heartfelt loathing).”
Additionally, should the supposed negotiations be happening on the studio level, making an end-run around the Tolkien Estate, it seems unlikely that Warner Brothers would be keen to work together after Disney stole Oz out from under them when they released Oz the Great and Powerful earlier this year. “The Walt Disney Company did not own rights to the original 1939 The Wizard of Oz movie but moved stealthily to mount an audacious raid on the story and leave a rival studio flat-footed.”
But perhaps TheOneRing.net’s April Fools’ story this year was actually prescient and we will enter an era where Hobbit feet and Mouse ears can coexist in one big glorious theme park universe. Or maybe we’ll all just have to aspire to visit the real Hobbiton for a while longer.
Time for our live webcast
TORnTUESDAY!
This week on our live show we invite you into our living room to enjoy an interactive 3-movie Extended Edition LOTR marathon! Currently underway actually in Van Nuys at Matt & Chris’ place (our talented actors who appeared onstage with me during our Long Expected Oscar Party) — we invite you to watch and chat with us during the entire playback. Yes, it will be going live continuously until about 1:00 or 2:00am Pacific Time so drop on by anytime! You can even synch up your DVD at home, we will tell you when we switch discs (we are just finished with FOTR Disc 2 and are about to begin TTT Disc 1). We are already live: so come say hello to your host Clifford
“Quickbeam” Broadway and Matt Musgrove (@Musgrovia on Twitter) and Chris Carwithen — Our innovative live show
includes worldwide fans who join us on the Live Event page
with a built-in IRC chat (affectionately known as Barliman’s Chat
room). Be part of the fun and mischief every week!
————————————————- Follow us on Twitter: @theoneringnet
Follow Cliff Broadway: @quickbeam2000
Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/theoneringnet
When Fili and Kili are forced to miss the county fair, they decide to bring the fair to them with some mischief in Farmer Maggot’s garden and pumpkin bread! In other words, we really did have to miss the fair after orcs attacked our truck tires, so we made the best of it by filming an episode! Recipe below.
Attention Legolas fans!
Actor Orlando Bloom is currently making his Broadway debut (sans blonde wig, we assume) in a new production of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet.
This is the first time Romeo and Juliet has been staged on Broadway in 36 years — and we have THREE pairs of tickets to giveaway to lucky TORn readers!
Bloom’s co-star is two-time Tony Award® nominee Condola Rashad, and the production is directed by five-time Tony Award® nominee David Leveaux. The play will open on Broadway on Thursday, September 19, 2013 at the Richard Rodgers Theatre; preview performances have been running since Saturday, August 24, 2013.
Continue reading “WIN TICKETS – Orlando Bloom in Romeo and Juliet on Broadway”
