Athena writes: If you guys missed Billy Crystal’s opening number (he sang about Each of the 5 nom’d pics for best Pic) I have compiled a transcript of his Song, based upon the the Sound of Music Song “Favorite Things”:

Hobbits with feet big and hairy and smelly
More epic battles than Gest and Minelli
Ian and Viggo, a Queen and some Kings
this is the gang in the Lord of the Rings

Frodo and Sam on a mystical planet
then Smeagol pops out like the right boob of Janet
Britney and JLo brought both of their flings
They thought it was called “The Return of the Rings”

Lithium, sake, some pills and peyote
Moonshine and britlan from Truman Capote
JRR Tolkien was taking these things
when he conceived of the Lord of the Rings

Peter Jackson made this trio.
He sure got it right.
I loved every frame of The Lord of the Rings.
So I downloaded it Last Night.
All Night
It took all night!
It’s so damn long!