Join us on Facebook!
Join us in our forums!
Get your tickets to Tolkien today!
Join us on Instagram

Latest Tweets

  1. TheOneRing.net
    TheOneRing.net: JRR Tolkien is like “I know a place” and it’s the same corner of the same pub every time https://t.co/hBaXoR81m2

  2. TheOneRing.net
    TheOneRing.net: You could have chosen a different screenshot in a story about COVID https://t.co/OoSrtdXunl

  3. TheOneRing.net
    TheOneRing.net: Now is the time to start reading Lord of the Rings. Grab a book, sit outside amongst nature and escape to Middle-ea… https://t.co/ucfhCVfy62

News Alerts

Get emailed with every new post!

Barlimaniacs Demosthenes and Melian wed in shock secret ceremony!

August 27, 2001 at 1:45 pm by leo  - 

Just when you thought you’d seen it all Barliman’s became the stage for a shock marriage between lovebirds Demosthenes and Melian, Ringer spy and Barliman’s regular Barliman sent in the following report…

In the early hours of last sunday (of course that all depends on from whose timezone your looking at things) I had the honour of being the Ringbearer on the surprising wedding of two of my regulars, Demosthenes and Melian. What a glorious moment it was. Before a crowd of Aussies and insomniac Americans Demosthenes pledged a vow that would make a grown man (like myself) cry, I wrote it down to remember;

‘Neither rock nor steel, not the fires of Morgoth, the wrath of Barliman and even the evils of Powers That Be, shall keep me from the treasure that i desire. Above gold, above silver … above silmarils. For Melian, mistress of mayhem, mightiest of maia. Melian, will you cleave to me?’

*snif*

After this Melian swooned and the ceremony began, in which Rev. MobyDick of The World Church performed a moving ceremony complete with homage to Professor Tolkien and Frank Vincent Zappa. With MadMax as the best man and Altariel as bridesmaid (before she unfortunally had to run off on a more urgent errand I deem) and of course myself as the Ringbearer (I’ll never get tired of saying that). After Demosthenes braided flowers through Melian’s hair and (as he said) ‘kissed her tastefully’ the reception took place in which it rained cake and snowed champagne, or the other way around, I can’t recall ’cause everyone was in an utter state of bliss. Which reminds me, some (Demosthenes) still needs to pick up the tab…

well, words fail me to describe the feeling of happiness that spread around my bar, if you’ll excuse me I think I’m gonna go wipe away another tear now..

A big thanks to Barliman for sending in this report, and as I gathered the happy couple is currently on their honeymoon in, where else, our very own bar! So don’t hesitate to come on in and congratulate them!

Posted in Barliman News on August 27, 2001 by
Thorin Oakenshield

Comments are closed.