{"id":85552,"date":"2013-12-27T11:37:19","date_gmt":"2013-12-27T16:37:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theonering.net\/torwp\/?p=85552"},"modified":"2013-12-27T11:37:19","modified_gmt":"2013-12-27T16:37:19","slug":"questions-questions-that-need-answering-in-the-hobbit-the-desolation-of-smaug","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theonering.net\/torwp\/2013\/12\/27\/85552-questions-questions-that-need-answering-in-the-hobbit-the-desolation-of-smaug\/","title":{"rendered":"Questions (questions that need answering!) in ‘The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug’"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Disclaimer:\u00a0 I enjoyed ‘The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug’ very much, and have seen it 3 times as of this writing.\u00a0 Smaug\u00a0is, in this writers opinion, THE dragon to end all dragons, and the creative team deserves kudos for the incredible sets, cgi,\u00a0costumes, and Thranduil’s eyebrows.\u00a0\u00a0 So it is with love and respect that I ask the following questions (spoilers ahead):<\/p>\n

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\"Tolkien<\/div>\n

Illustration by Otis Frampton<\/em><\/p>\n

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  • \u00a0Is it ever sunny and dry in Bree?<\/li>\n
  • Where does Beorn keep his pants post-skin change?<\/li>\n
  • What snarky remark must Thranduil\u00a0have said\u00a0to\u00a0the\u00a0dragon (Smaug?)\u00a0to get that nasty scar on his face?<\/li>\n
  • Does Tauriel\u00a0secretly have an “I (heart) Hot Dwarves” t-shirt under her outfit? (\u00a0Legolas must be jealous.)<\/li>\n
  • What is the landspeed\u00a0velocity of an unladen Orc?<\/li>\n
  • Gandalf\u00a0appears to use the Patronus spell during his encounter with The Necromancer <\/del>Saaauuurrron.\u00a0 What form would it take?<\/li>\n
  • Where did Tauriel\u00a0(a self-described\u00a0‘lowly Sylvan Elf’) learn such impressive healing skills? \u00a0(Arwen must be\u00a0jealous.)<\/li>\n
  • How would Smaug\u00a0have known the name ‘Oakenshield’, unless he leaves Erebor for the occasional\u00a0pint at the Prancing Pony?<\/li>\n
  • Did the dwarves REALLY think that a little molten gold would hurt a fire-breathing dragon with impenetrable scales, or did they just think a little bling would soothe his hurt feelings?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
    \n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Disclaimer:\u00a0 I enjoyed ‘The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug’ very much, and have seen it 3 times as…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":85581,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4,148,1911],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-85552","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-hobbit-movie","category-hobbit","category-the-hobbit-the-desolation-of-smaug"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t